Saturday, December 20, 2008

At Least It's Christmas Colors...

Did you know that elderly folks, people with poor hygiene habits, and people who live in group housing facilities have a high occurrence rate for staph infections? Did you further know that people who work with other folks with that set of risk factors have an increased risk on contracting staph infections? Further still, are you aware that your old pal Skippy does social work in a sheltered workshop for mentally handicapped people who live in group homes and have, overall, pretty poor hygiene? And finally, did you know that Skippy's girlfriend works as a chef in a luxury retirement community full of old folks who also have troublingly sub-par hygiene?

I suppose by now you've figured out why I've brought all this up. Turns out that all the hand sanitizer on in the planet can't forestall such a bothersome cluster of risk factors forever. Ol' Skippy dodged the bullet on this one, but alas my girlfriend did not. Now she's undergoing the delightful and mind-expanding experience of having an infected, ulcerated axillary lymph node. With all those adjectives you just know that it's gross.

I'm not trying to make light of it because it's painful as hell and can develop nasty complications, but I'm preemptively explaining what's likely to be a period of neglect for this blog. Right now she's on a regimen of painkillers and Everlasting Gob-antibiotics (Seriously, they're like the size of peanut M&Ms.) and my boyfriend responsibilities have been switched to changing her bandages and squeezing dollops of lava-hot brown pus out of her side while she curses my very existence.

Anyway, that's your heads-up.

3 comments:

sirchton said...

". . . my boyfriend responsibilities have been switched to changing her bandages and squeezing dollops of lava-hot brown pus out of her side while she curses my very existence."

Was that last bit really necessary? And, even though we do not know the lady, was it yours to divulge?

Aside from that, keep up the good work.

Skippy the Skeptic said...

Not sure what you mean. Copious, disgusting discharge comes with the territory as far as staph infections go. We'd considered posting a picture, actually, but decided -that- would be a TMI situation. Or did you take the allusion to "my boyfriend duties" to be a sexual reference? That's not the interpretation I had in mind.

That being said, if I were the one with the infection I'd probably have put Youtube videos of the thing up by now...as painful and gross as it is, she and I both find the whole thing fascinating. It kind of makes me wonder how they treated infections like this in the days before antibiotics. I wonder if they'd just try and cut the thing out or what...

Jason said...

Fascination is what makes life worth living. Good luck with the illness. Hope everything turns out ok.